"The Me I Thought I Wasn't"

The Me I Thought I Wasn’t  

John 5:4New King James Version (NKJV)

⁴ For whatever is born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. 

                    I could see my reflection as I looked into the mirror as I looked closer I could see that my hair was turning gray around the edges, and dark spots around my eyes.  I was tired, physically, emotionally and spiritually.  My outer appearance could be enhanced, but with a little concealer around my eyes, foundation on my face, lipstick mascara and “Wa-lah” I liked what I saw.  My reflection, my outward appearance all covered.  How easy was that?

          Looking at oneself in a mirror and the ability to change it in an instance is normal.  That was the problem; I only saw the outside of me.  On the outside I was normal, I could blend in, I was accepted.  But, the inside of me was in a battle, no, a war.  Satan had invaded my space; he had placed a stake in the ground and was trying to claim his territory. As the young people say, “It was on and poppin”.  My life was in turmoil; death, deceit and devastation surrounded me. I could see distress on my face and in my eyes. The reflection in the mirror was no longer me, I looked defeated.  

          I looked like a cake that stuck to a pan, and I tried to covered myself with icing so my defects could not be seen.   I was defective, but not destroyed. I had fallen apart but I had some ingredients within that outweighed my presentation.  Even with visible war scares, something within was summons to the forefront.  It was my Faith!

          Even Satan realizes with faith all things are possible.  That day I stopped looking in the mirror for a reflection, and I begin to look out the window.  I realized the windows of heaven had open up to me, and blessings poured out over me.  I could now see things that were not as if they were.  I could smile in sorrow because I remembered that all things work together for good even when it doesn’t fell good.   I was being prepared for greater.  My challenges would now become my testimony.  I would Bless God by being a blessing to someone else. 

          My story is simple when you look at it, as simple as baking bread.  After all the right ingredients are combined, (because the success of baking is dependent upon the ingredients).  So I took my cup of sorrow (tears), my pinch of uncertainty (doubt), my half cup of anxiety (uncertainty) and blended it into my bowl of power (Gods Word), my joy (Gods Presence) and  my peace(Gods Promises).  I placed it in the oven of my heart and set it at 111 degrees.  Why only 111, 1 for the FATHER, 1 for the SON and 1 for THE HOLY SPIRIT.  It baked slowly, the blending of the ingredients began to send a sweet aroma in the air and I began to rise to my calling.  Scripture after scripture flowed from my tongue and I was now able to digest the bread of life, I would never be without. “Oh Taste and See that the Lord is Good” Psalms 34:8 “Greater is he that is in me than he who is in the world” I John 4:4.  “But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ”. I Corinthians 15:57

          Even now when I look in the mirror to make up my face I use Gods word as my foundation, Grace and Mercy conceals me and the Blood covers me.  I am delivered, I am set free “I Am the Me I Thought I Wasn’t”.  A vessel God can use!

         

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